On this week’s podcast, we hear from Reid Bervik, a 25-year-old Millennial who was raised in an Evangelical Christian home and through a series of experiences, chose to stop attending church 2 1/2 years ago. Reid opens up about his craving for mentorship and the lens in which he views Christianity after some painful relationships with other Christians. This podcast is a first in a series of why Millennials are leaving organized church as we know it. Please comment on Reid’s story in the comment section below. Share with integrity and know that my purpose in this series is to build up the Body of Christ. I believe it is God’s passion to bring each one of His children back to Himself and we have no idea what that might look like.
I really like that you are talking about Faith, as it will encourage young adults to give serious thought as to what they are or are not believing. And they will be able to come up with deep questions on their faith.
Yes! It’s my hope we can listen to one another ask risky questions and talk about our faith without judgment. I agree with you that all of us need to give serious thought about what we believe or don’t believe. What I’d like to see is young adults who own their share of the responsibility, as well. When you think about it, our faith is not just based on feelings. Reid’s questions and concerns come from a deep faith! I truly believe he is a thoughtful young man who loves God. But I’d still like to hear how he discovers and owns his beliefs in the weeks and months to come. Thank you for your response.
Wow, just listened to Reid Bervik’s story. He brings to light many thoughts and experiences that we’ve probably all have had along our Christian journey. A few things really stand out to me about Reid, and are evidenced in young people brought up in the church. So often, it’s assumed our children “hear” the Word at church, and by associating with other young Christians, they grow in the Lord. We must be in daily prayer for our children, and pray for discernment of the Truth. This is a very confusing world, and as the Bible prophesizes truth will be evasive in the end times.
Pam, your follow up questions were right on. “How do you reconcile God’s Word with what you just described?” Finding truth. Discerning how to know what is truth. Reid went through the motions of church, but did not embrace God’s word as truth. Negative responses from the church: women’s role. Pastor showed verse and went on. Reid saw this as arrogance.
Thank you, Pam, for taking this important topic on and for sharing. It helps me have insight and I pray continually for wisdom and discernment as we hit the battlefield for our young people.
Linda, Great to hear your thoughts on this heart-felt issue for every one of us! You are spot on about us praying for us to hear the Word deeply and not just listen to it. Thank you for the reminder to pray fervently!
Great to hear you on the podcast! I give you a lot of credit for being a great listener and questioner. I was ready to yank my hair out listening to Reid! I really hope he figures things out a bit by the time he starts counseling others. What lost and confused person is going to be helped by going to another lost and confused person, who actually thinks he is wise?
I feel sad about what’s happening to the minds of the younger generation. Kids these days!!! Boy do I sound old.
There will be a stark dividing line in the church between those adhering to biblical truth and those who morph into a culturally accepted brand of Christianity, as in 2 Tim 3….
“having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people. For among them are those who creep into households and capture weak women, burdened with sins and led astray by various passions, always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth.”
2 Timothy 3:5-7 ESV
https://www.bible.com/59/2ti.3.5-7.esv
How should we as committed Christians pray for these young souls? Lord, please open their eyes to the Way, the Truth, and the Life that they may bow a humble knee and confess that You are Lord. Free them from themselves to fully worship You today in awe and surrender. Help us to engage them in a way where questions are welcome and their voice is heard. Help us to encourage them with patience and wrestle with them through tough questions. And help us lovingly direct them back to You, the creator and lover of their souls.
Love you sister!!
Sharon, Thank you for your comments. I don’t hear Reid being lost as much as I hear him finding another way back to God. Your question is a good one: How should we pray? And How should we listen? I hope you will stay in this conversation as we post other stories from people who have left the Church and those who have come back. To me, it’s important we find some common threads so people like Reid can rest in a season of healing–hopefully in some form of spiritual community. Good hearing from you, Sharon!
I asked my Bible teacher to listen to Pam’s podcast: Why He Left the Church. This was his response:
“When I think of my reaction, Reid’s story is the story of most Millennials that I meet. This is not a bad thing, but clearly, the church doesn’t understand the needs of this generation. When I think of how we try to teach the Bible at APU, we want students to ask honest questions about their faith and learn how to wrestle with the text. Like, Jacob, we want students to wrestle with God and walk away with a blessing, even though that sometimes we might walk away with a limp. It’s not wrestling for wrestling’s sake. We want to see students leave APU stronger Christians, more secure in their faith, and more articulate about what they believe and why, even if they don’t have all of the answers.
I think of an Israeli professor of mine who walked into the first day of class and said, “I am here to enrich you with a new uncertainty.” We all looked at each other wondering how one can be enriched by uncertainty. Then Dr. Rainey stated, “One mark of a mature faith is an ability to live with questions.” Reid has many questions, but it sounds like he has not yet come to a place where he can live with the uncertainty and still find meaning in his faith. And that’s okay because when I heard him talk, I didn’t hear the voice of a cynic. I heard a person who believes in God in the deepest more innermost part of his being but the reality of the church today and the doctrinal mindset of too many Christians, cannot allow him to be who he is, the thoughtful, feeling, and seeking person he is, without fearing that he will be misunderstood or judged. He also appears to be waylaid by people who claim to be Christians but don’t live out that faith in compassionate service to others. I think of comments I read by Christians on Facebook when they decry the poor, charge immigrants with being a burden on society, and admire leaders who do not exhibit a single Christian virtue in the way they live out their lives. It is no wonder that Reid is disturbed by what he sees and wants to live out his life as Christ would but without the doctrinal mindset and all of the judgment.
In a letter written to the APU Board of Trustees last year, the author (believe it or not, a professor at APU) claimed that 50% of APU students leave with their faith totally destroyed by their Biblical Studies professors. I was stunned by that claim because this is the exact opposite of what students write about us and contrary to what we seek to instill in our students. Ironically, in a survey conducted by the Barnea Group (an organization that polls Christians about their faith and the state of the church), they discovered that 75% of Christian high schoolers abandon their faith by the time they graduate from high school or early into their college years. When asked why the most common reason given was that their pastors refused to let them honestly ask questions they had about their faith and the Bible. This echoes what Reid said. Rather than listening to them in the way your mom did to Reid, these pastors shut them down and tell them that it is a sin to doubt and that they just need to get their act together and believe what the Bible teaches (actually, code for blindly accepting the pastor’s interpretation).
One of the dangers of the megachurch movement is that the pressure to conform squeezes out opportunities for Christians to voice their doubts and accept them for who they are. Not all megachurches are like this, mind you, but far too many are, and honest seekers are getting waylaid by them and choosing to abandon the church rather than seek another faith context that might allow them to grow and flourish. Obviously, we cannot keep track of everyone’s spiritual state in our classrooms at APU, but we can foster an attitude of openness and honesty that allows students to freely ask the kinds of questions that trouble them. In the end, I personally feel that if I have done my job training students how to read Scripture intelligently and faithfully that when the questions and doubts arise, students will be able to better balance faith and doubt. And while some might judge or ridicule those who doubt, there is a benefit to doubt in that it provides an opening through which the Holy Spirit can enter our lives and dialogue with us. Doubt also forces us off a plateau that many feel comfortable on and do not feel compelled to move on and grow spiritually. Wrestling with doubt gives us a chance to seek new answers to old questions. While some may not survive this journey, most of us do, and in the process, eventually discover that the very God who has indwelt us from the beginning has remained at our side and sustained us throughout, even though we were not fully aware of it. It is another example of “God in action behind the scenes.” Personally, I believe Reid is the kind of person who will emerge on the other side a stronger and better Christian than he is already.
Anyway, these are a few of my thoughts. Thanks for sharing the link!”